Me, My Scarf and . . . Sour Grapes

My friend Lindsey sent me info on a scarf contest called "Me, My Scarf and I." As I've mentioned a thousand times, I hate sewing. However, I hate paying for alterations even more. The first prize for this contest was a serger. A serger is a special (and VERY expensive) sewing machine for sewing knits . . . basically, if you have a serger, you don't need anything else. I want one because I can make my own alterations to my clothes (I wear weird sizes, so a lot of my stuff has to be altered).

The contest was to make a scarf that echoed your personality. You had to use a sewing machine for at least part of the construction. I had what I thought was a good idea. I decided to make a screenwriting scarf. I wasn't serious about making a scarf until I told my Mom my idea. She thought it was so good she ran out and bought me the materials . . . then, I had no choice. : ) I have such a nice mom.

Along with pics of the scarf, I had to provide an explanation about how the scarf fits my personality. Just warning you, this is really embarrassing. I can't begin to tell you how humiliating it is to be a grown woman (well, sort of) and have to write a description of your personality. So, yeah, it's really lame. The only thing that gave me comfort was that there were a lot of descriptions way more lame than mine. Someone actually wrote a poem about herself. I'm not kidding.

Here's the description I posted for the contest:

I am in love with the movies. I’ve been writing screenplays for a few years now and thanks to my placement as a quarterfinalist in the Nicholl Fellowship competition (woohoo!), I’ve had some interest in a my script. With all this excitement, I decided to make a Hollywood themed scarf. I consider this scarf a good luck charm that will allow me to make my dreams come true . . . to finally sell a screenplay and see it come to life.

I used red velveteen on one side to represent the “red carpet.” The black side (it’s actually silver lame, but I used the “wrong side”) is supposed to represent a film strip. Each square contains a movie quote, to honor screenwriting. (I used iron-on transfers for that part.) I purposely left off what movie each quote comes from . . . that way, the scarf is also a conversation piece . . . and I love to talk! The quotes range from classic to quirky . . . I’m a combination of class and quirkiness. Well, I’m probably more quirky than classy! I used gold thread around each square and gold beading on the ends to represent the Best Original Screenwriting Oscar I may one day win!

This scarf overall represents my determination and passion . . . plus, it’s gaudy, which probably describes me the most.

Here are the quotes featured on the scarf. Can you guess what movies they come from (without Googling)?

"You're gonna need a bigger boat."
"I see dead people."
"A boy's best friend is his mother."
"Open the pod bay doors, HAL."
“I like your sleeves. They’re real big.”
“Snakes. Why did it have to be snakes?”
“Sorry about the ‘bug eye’ thing, Jeanine.”
“It’s dull, you twit. It’ll hurt more.”

Well, despite the fact that my scarf seems to the only non-patchwork quilt, I won nothing. Can you tell I'm bitter? I really despise contests that claim to be about one thing only to really be another. They claimed that the contest was more about creativity and showing personality than about sewing. If that was true, then why did all the winning scarves look exactly the same? I'm not kidding. They were all patchy quilts with at least one bird on it. They were harder to construct than mine . . . it was a sewing snob contest. It was ONLY about the sewing. I guess it's my fault that I willingly entered a sewing contest actually believing I could win! It still feels good to gripe.